Journaling along the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage

Has it ever happened to you to drive or travel by bus on the highway when your mind drifts off? The road is long and straight, it is in the middle of the night and the traffic is smooth, so you let your mind revisit all those thoughts that have been left unfinished, all those problems that are asking for a solution, all those aspects that you need to evaluate and integrate within your internal filters.

When being in this diffused mode of thinking, after a while, you tend to select from all the random ideas, most of them trivial and unimportant, those threads of thought which are really valuable to you, the ones that bring to the surface authentic and profound meaning to what you are experiencing at that moment of your life.

The good news is that you can reenact this process, consciously and in the proper context, and allocate it enough time in order to support you in tackling higher and more complex issues such as finding your direction in life, dealing with a career shift or clarifying your emotional life.

About the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage

The specific context I am talking about is undertaking the well-known pilgrimage of Camino de Santiago (The way of St. James). In this blog post I am going to stress upon the entire experience of personal renewal and discovery during this trail walking and how you can use journaling to extract the most out of it. This can of course be used to any of your travels.

The Pilgrimage Camino de Santiago has been a religious route followed by believers, going as far back as the middles ages. It was meant to offer the ones who completed it plenary indulgence. In the past 20 years, this practice has grown and developed, nowadays attracting more than 200.000 people each year.

The Pilgrimage attracts different nationalities of which the most frequent ones are Spanish, German, Italian, Portuguese, American and French. It has different starting points, the 2 most popular ones being: Sarria in Spain, and Saint-Jean-Pied-de-Port in France.

This pilgrimage is the only trail trekking route which is finished by almost as many women as by men. The age of the majority of the persons deciding to embark on such an experience ranges between 30 and 60 years old. Most of them complete the route by foot, but a small percentage choose biking, horse riding, and even wheelchairs.

Depending on the chosen trajectory, the distance can range from 650 km (starting from Portugal), to 750 km (starting from France) or 800 km (from the Spanish starting point). The estimated time to finish the routes and arrive at Santiago de Compostela takes around 6 weeks.

The ones deciding to take this challenge and walk so many kilometers on foot have diverse reasons such as: religion, spiritual awakening, health, personal struggles, self reflection or a sense of accomplishment.

This introductory information about the pilgrimage can be completed by reading the numerous books and blogs dedicated to this experience, or by watching the documentary made in 2013, called Walking the Camino: Six Ways to Santiago. Additionally, an artistic movie which left a very profound impression on me: The Way, a film starring Martin Sheen and Emilio Estevez (2010).

All the details regarding preparation and what you may need to pack, together with practical advice, can be obtained from the forums dedicated to this pilgrimage. More personal notes from those which have finished it can be found in the journals that they have uploaded online on trailjournals.com, or other similar sites.

Besides this, and from what I have researched so far, this pilgrimage is a life changing experience that we all need to achieve at least once in a lifetime. If you find yourself in a moment where you need to put order in your life, you are looking for a deeper meaning in life, you want to get the answers for the questions that have been following you so far, then this might be what you need.

Journaling prompts for the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage

My personal contribution towards this wonderful experience is to offer you a framework for filling your journal entries, so that you can take the most out of this pilgrimage or any other self discovery travel/journey you might embark on, and if you have not considered this, then see if this might be something for you. I have divided these prompts into 3 different stages as follows:

Before you leave

Take the time to prepare for this journey, make sure you have the appropriate time, context and state of mind to answer the following questions:

• Why have I decided to go on this pilgrimage?
• What do I expect to get out of this experience?
• What do I lack right now and I want to find along the way?
• How do I see myself at the end of the road?
• How do I want to feel on the route?
• How do I want to feel when I arrive at the Cathedral Santiago de Compostela?
• What kind of experiences am I eager to live?
• What type of persons do I want to meet along the way?
• What type of persons do I need to meet along the way?
• What don’t I want to experience during this trip?
• What are the main lessons I expect to receive by the end?
• How do I want my life to change upon my return?
• What stories do I want to share to my friends and my family once I am back home?
• What is the most important aspect of this pilgrimage for me?

During the pilgrimage

On the route you have chosen, try to keep a journal with you in which you have written down the answers from the previous questions, so that you can get back to them whenever you feel like doing so.

Most probably, you are going to be really tired and will want to crash directly into a bed, but taking even 5-10 minutes to write down will give you invaluable insights. My suggestion is that you ensure that every day, before going to a well-deserved sleep, you take the time to answer this short set of questions:

• What was the most beautiful moment of the day?
• What was the most difficult moment of the day? How did you manage to overcome it?
• What was the most important lesson you got from today?
• What do you want to remember from today, 30 years from now?
• What are you grateful for?

Returning home

 After you arrived home, and you had had the time to recover and get quality rest, take the time to go through the answers you have written before leaving, and during the pilgrimage. Use this time to have a proper closure of the experience and take full advantage of your journal entries. In this sense, answer the following questions:

• Did I get what I was initially expecting to take from this experience? What else did I get?
• How did I feel when I have reached the cathedral at the end of my trip?
• How have I changed in the past weeks?
• What type of persons have I met along the way? What have I learned from them?
• What are the main lessons that I have received during the pilgrimage?
• How do I plan to apply these lessons in my life?
• What do I plan to do differently from now on?
• What am I motivated and committed to achieving after this trip?
• What needs to happen in order to honour the experience of this pilgrimage?
• How do I want to interact with the persons in my life?
• What is the most important thing in my life right now?
• What is the promise that I make to myself after this journey?

These are the journaling prompts that I propose for your Camino de Santiago experience, so that you can get the most out of it and vividly live every minute of it. Feel free to add any questions that you consider important to you, leave out the redundant ones, but do keep a recording of it all as it’s a unique and very fit opportunity for self-discovery and renewal.

Journaling: how to start your practice today?

Journaling is an easy daily practice which you can start today! It practically requires a low budged, close to zero, a dedicated time ranging from 5 minutes to 30 minutes and no previously required abilities. Nonetheless, the benefits it brings, from an emotional, mental, health and development point of view, are priceless.

In the first article published on this topic, Journaling your way towards personal success, you can find more details about the practice of journaling, such as:

• What is journaling?
• Why would you want to start journaling?
• What are the health benefits of journaling?

In this second article, also dedicated to the journaling series, I will detail how you can get started with this practice, by offering you a step-by-step process. This helps you if you are new to this area or if you have tried journaling in the past, but for one reason or another, you stopped and now you want to renew this practice.

In case you feel prepared to start your practice, I still recommend that you peruse the content of this article as it may give you new and interesting perspectives.

The step-by-step process of getting started with journaling

1. Find the reason for starting this practice

As I mentioned in the previous article, it is very important to know why you would like to implement this habit. This way you ensure that it will be an enjoyable activity for you, and not perceive it as a task you impose on yourself. In the same time, you increase your chances of getting the most out of the entire experience.

In order to explore this part, you can take a few moments to answer several clarifying questions. Write down your answers on a paper so you can come back to them later on, when you might need an extra boost of motivation.

• What is the main purpose you have for starting writing in your journal?
• What is the need you want to address by starting a journaling practice?
• What problem can this practice solve for you?
• What are the results you want to see with implementing this habit?
• How do you plan to make use of writing daily on your chosen subjects?
• How do you want to feel while journaling?
• What do you want to experience through this practice?
• How does this practice fit with your current reality?

Once you have answers for these questions, you can always come back to them when you feel you are faltering in your practice, and rediscover the “WHY” behind your choice in the first hand.

In the meantime, if you have finished writing the answers for these questions, congratulations! You have already started journaling without even knowing it. I am convinced that it wasn’t even as difficult as you imagined it to be.

2. Choose the type of journal that best fits you

Once you are really clear on your motivation for starting this practice, find the most suitable format and type of journal to suit your purpose. In order to do so, settle between:

• What are the trends or the topics that kept on surfacing while answering the questions from the previous point? This will surely give you an image on the type of the journal you are looking for.
• What is the silver lining of all your journaling entries? What is the common element which will connect all of them?
• Do you want to address a specific topic or you want to write in a stream of consciousness whatever comes to your mind?
• Do you want to create your own questions or journaling prompts or you want to answer predefined questions and prompts?
• Do you want to have a structure you follow each day or you want to have a totally different approach each time you write?
• Do you want to use only words or you are considering drawing, doodling or using mixed media?

In the next articles on this subject I will focus on the types of journals you can choose from, and offer examples of prompts to kick start your writing, so do not miss them.

3. Settle on the best time of the day

Increase your chances of journaling each day by establishing the starting point and the duration you estimate for this practice. When you give your mind an estimation of time for each project, it is easier to grasp the needed effort and it will not sabotage you.

For example:

I start journaling each day at 09:00 and I write for 15 minutes.

If you are a morning person, and you prefer to set aside the “you time” at the start of your day, you can establish the starting time of this practice at early hours.

If you work better during the evening, and you want to relax after each day with documenting the experiences you had had, you can choose your starting point and include it in your evening routine. Nonetheless, do not put it 30 minutes before going to sleep, as your mind needs time to rewind and stop processing feelings, thoughts, and experiences before shutting down.

Morning time best fits for intentions and gratitude journals, while evening time best fits reviewing the day and taking out the main learning points.

It is really important to choose a time that best suits your purpose and your preferences, and estimate the duration so that you will have a clear structure to follow each day and not slide from this practice.

4. Prepare your tools and space

First you have to decide whether you will be writing in cursive, or you prefer digital.

There are many studies advocating for choosing the pen and paper, since writing is activating a specific part of the brain – the reticular activating system (RAS), which is responsible for filtering and bringing into our sphere of attention the information we are handling and focusing on.

Maud Purcell, a journaling expert, states that “I find that most of my patients intuitively know that hand-writing their thoughts in a journal is more effective than composing them on a laptop.”

In the end, you should choose the environment with which you feel the most comfortable with. Give a try to cursive writing if you haven’t written by hand in a long time, but if it does not serve you, then opt for the most easy way for you, it should not be an obstacle of starting the practice.

Concerning the place, make sure that you find a location which is both quiet and private, meaning that you can write without being disturbed. If you work better with surrounding noise, and you can journal in a coffee place as well, just make sure you will feel at ease with people passing by your table.

Whatever style and location best fits your needs and purpose is the right one, and, in the end, it should be the needed facilitator for your writing experience.

5. Identify what is holding you back from starting this practice

You might be just considering to start this practice, or you might have heard about journaling, think it is an interesting practice, but kept on postponing that moment in which you sit down and start writing.

Either way, it is necessary for you to identify what are the obstacles that stand in your way of writing. Most of the time, these obstacles that prevent you from not starting now, are your own limiting beliefs.

Here are some examples of limiting beliefs, and how to overcome them:

• I was never good at writing;

Journaling does not require special abilities in mastering words, nor does it imply creating a literature masterpiece. Journaling is a simple reflection of what you feel, how you think and what you are experiencing, expressed in written words. Do not spend time thinking how talented you are in writing, this is something that does not matter at all, when starting a journaling practice.

• Everything needs to be perfect before I start;

If you are a perfectionist, then you might be waiting for the perfect time, for the perfect mood, for the perfect pen, for the perfect paper, for the perfect everything. And even though all these can help your practice, do not get stuck in the process of finding them, make do with what you have at your disposal at that moment, and enhance the practice in time.

• I don’t want to open up old wounds;

It might be difficult to relive stressful moments, bad experiences, negative emotions, or painful events. But writing them down does not hurt more than keeping them inside of you and letting them grow even bigger than they are. If you are in such a situation, start writing and take a break when you feel you’re getting overwhelmed. Take a deep breath, calm down and continue with writing.

Find out what is stopping you from starting this wonderful practice. Ask yourself if these limiting beliefs are really true. Come up with solutions to deal with them, otherwise, you might find yourself postponing something which can bring you countless benefits.

This was the second article from the journaling series. In the next article I will develop on the different types of journals that you can start with and what they imply.

These being said, start your journaling practice today!

A lost and found story

Some time ago I went to visit one of my friends. She just came back to Romania for a couple of weeks and I really wanted to see her. It was a short stay for her, planning to see all her relatives, also a shot trip to the mountains, so she invited me to go to her, not being able to stop by Sibiu.

She and her husband were staying at her parents’ holiday house, a neat, spacious and modern in taste and design place, somewhere close to the mountains, in a village. I took a train and I was off to something I could not expect even in my most beautiful dreams.

When I got to their direction, where the taxi left me from the train station, I was already giddy with excitement. It was so so good to see her, we spent the first moments of being together reconnecting and catching up, both physically and emotionally.

I guess we talked for a minute before hugging each other again and this went on repeat when 20 minutes later, we had all the essential of our lives covered since we last met and our affection reservoirs were filled. Soon after we realised that I did not even get to say hi to her husband who was back in the yard. Yes, they were so nice, that they were already waiting for me with a barbecue.

I soon discovered that we were a merry bunch, another friend of Iulia’s was there and soon our closest mutual friend would join as well and Iulia’s husband’s brother was there as well. I had not met him before and I did not even know he existed, I was very close to Iulia but it never occurred to me nor her, in our endless conversations to ever talk about her husband’s family and whenever I talked with him, we had intriguing conversations about life and anything else in between but there was no occasion where it caught my attention that he had a brother.

Anyway, my mind is going around the bushes now, like it did back then as well, I was unable to really focus for those days, I was just living. So, I exit the house, get into the yard and a few meters away, her husband is at the barbecue, facing us and his brother facing him, he had his back to us.

The meagre distance which separated us and the few steps we made until we reached them, felt like an eternity, I am amazed to this day how come I did not drop my glass, since my whole body started feeling numb and tingly at the same time, like I was made entirely of hyperactive, glowing in the dark, very coloured glitter, all in a chaos and flutter of activity inside of me.

So, he was sitting with his back to me, I had not really seen his face yet, but since I set my eyes on him, there were so many strange sensations inside of me that I could not use my mind anymore. He was holding a beer in his right hand and his left had was casually left in his jeans’ pocket. His short brown hair was left to be on its own, and it knew what it was doing. He was wearing a simple blue navy T-Shirt and flip flops since it was very sunny and pleasant outside. I should have stopped there and come to my senses since I do not trust at all people who consciously decide to put things between their toes and can still walk with no effort.

Anyway, looking at him from the back, he was quite a sight, and I somehow knew that I did not need to see his face in order to have my seal of approval since my whole being was instantly knowing this, relying on a sense that has nothing to do with my eyes.

He was a head and a bit taller than me, the height I quite prefer, his strong arms made for all-wonderous-forget-about-everything-hugs and his whole body was in perfect proportion, there was nothing out of place. I don’t actually remember what I was wearing, but I perfectly know what he looked like, I don’t actually remember much from the house but I can perfectly picture the veins in his strong arms, the neatly cut nails and beautiful fingers, his eyebrows, his hair, his lips, his smile.

I am sidetracking again, so back to the story. After living all of this, mostly in my head, which felt like a million years, just walking some meters to meet him, feeling like I have already met him before, feeling a strong pull towards him, we finally get to them. I say hello to Iulia’s husband and then hugged him, I guess it was a tighter and longer hug than I would normally allow myself with him, but I was already hungry for some affection and I let out some of my feelings which were already overwhelming me.

When I turned around, I shook hands with him, and I mumbled something about me being used with giving people hugs, and not even finishing the sentence I feel my body throwing itself into his arms, without me actually giving consent. But it was soon fine since my whole body felt quite in place with him, I needed to raise myself a little bit on my toes so that my arms would feel comfortable around his neck and give the chance to our hearts to meet.

I honestly do not know how long that hug was, since it felt like I kind of stopped entirely to exist in those moments, or more like, I was so present in that hug that everything around me disappeared, and I am not talking only about my surroundings but also my memories, my past, my future, I was just in that embrace and nothing else, and it felt like we have reencountered ourselves after being lost over different past lives, not even knowing we have been searching for each other.

Only as I am sitting now to write this, I feel the intensity of the encounter, the intensity of my feelings and everything that happened back then. In that moment I was not able to process anything anymore, my main computer just shut down and I was left with the bare necessities. I don’t remember what exactly happened next, I was still in that embrace in my head, but I remember we had a couple of minutes to ourselves since everybody started chatting in between themselves, like life resumed around and was waiting for us to come out of our slumber and join back.

We did talk a bit, a small chit chat, I can’t put my finger on any detail we shared but I am pretty sure that everything which came out from my mouth was monosyllabic at best. If my utterances would be distinguished as words, it would have sounded like something in between a Neanderthal speaking and a baby learning a few words, since my ability to be articulate disappears completely when I am close to a member of the opposite sex to whom I feel a strong attraction to.

All my training experience and public speaking goes down the toilet when I most need it, and all I am able to do is nod for every two words the other person is saying and having an ear to ear grin, like all the Indians you meet, being very affectionate, grinning and nodding all the time, and wanting to talk to you, touch you, be your friend, but not really finding the words and the English necessary to rise up to the occasion.

The following days are a blur in my mind, I remember our best friend joined us and we were a trio of sharing life long memories, laughing, crying, and just feeling close to each other. I felt like I was high all the time, high on life, high on love, high on the endless sunny days. I know that I was over effusive with my friends, and somewhat they emulated my state and it was a magical time together, and this heightened state was only because my whole being became completely and utterly alive since the moment I could feel his heart being close to mine.

The curious part is that I do not remember much of what actually happened those days, just that I was happy without reserves, a type of complete happiness, undiluted and uninterrupted by any mundane things. But what I remember clearly, is seeing my friends faces, in a very strange close up, without necessarily seeing their bodies, and having an enormous glow all over their face, and a huge smile all the time.

I can see their faces clearly in my mind when I think of those times, like some obscure miracle renaissance painting from a church, where all the background is faded and lost to the blackness of the candle smoke, the bodies of the characters are lost in time but their faces are miraculously preserved, and full of colour and brightness in contrast with everything else in the painting.

But there are three other moments, besides the first time I saw him that I remember clearly. One was in the third evening spent together when the weather was so fine that we decided out of the blue to throw a small party. We arranged the backyard with all these beautiful lights all over the place, like cute, magic fireflies, we set up some tables and chairs and even had a nice, small dancing ring on a very huge carpet.

We had a no shoes rule and so, thank God, the flip flops left the scene and made everything be perfect. There were a couple of other friends of Iulia and her husband joining us, and there was a racket of laughter and loud chatter, and just literally a bunch of people enjoying their time together on a beautiful warm night, under a beautiful night sky, with the moon, the stars and every wish out there waiting to be wished.

I don’s know when you came to me and asked me to dance, but since that moment, you and me were inseparable, we danced the whole night, like it was the end of the world. There was nothing else besides us, all the people disappeared completely, we did not care about what others thought, there was no space left in our minds nor our hearts to take anything else in consideration besides each other. We were moving our bodies in so much sync that it felt like they were made for each other, there was no space in between us, no hesitation, no stumbling, no words, no thoughts, just slow dancing, to the rhythms of our hearts more than following the rhythm of the songs.

Whenever a song would end, we would just stay embraced, eyes closed and continue when the next song followed, not wanting to let anybody else in between us, break this wonderful spell. I don’t know who chose the playlist or if there was anybody choosing the songs, but they were made for the two of us to continue this dream the whole night.

We were awakened from this slumber with a timid tap on our shoulders when we finally opened our eyes and saw that everybody was starting to leave and my friends started clearing out the tables. There was a little bit of embarrassment, like two kids being caught in the back of the garden giving each other a small kiss, but it soon went away since nothing could really stand in front of the powerful connection which was between us, which we felt and the rest could see and sense as well. It came natural for everybody not to dwell much on it, nor poking around it with questions, they took it as it was, as completely as we did.

The rest of the days went by really fast, and we did not get the chance to be alone or as close as we have been, physically, while dancing. It seems that we created all these ways in which we let some space between us, like two magnets which you place too far away to still attract each other, and we religiously kept this space between us the entirety of my stay, maybe having in mind that if we ever just slightly miss a step we would immediately find ourselves in each others arms and never let ourselves go.

It was a pleasant time all together, in this cosy bunch, with a lot of talking late in the night, boardgames and cooking together during the day, going to the waterfall on the hiking route two hours away from the house, having a picnic right there, playing badminton and basking in the sun as much as we could possibly do. But like all good things in life, it also came to an end. I had not realised how the days flew by, I came back to earth only when my friend asked me one morning what time did I have the train, realising my week went away in a bat of an eye.

We had a really nice lunch, which you insisted on preparing yourself, for everybody, with no help, but I felt like it was your farewell gift for me. Soon after that, I set out to pack my things. I was midway packing, with my brains scattered all over the place, not really being able to focus on the task, just letting my hands remember how I did the packing and leave them move about without really thinking about what I was doing.

You approached me and I became aware that you were close to me only when I felt your perfume mixed with your own distinct smell. I had enough time to forever memorise the smell of your skin as I got drunk with it while I dug my nose in your neck the whole night we danced together.

I turned from my bag being startled, you started laughing a little bit, but then you put your hand on my hip, and it rested there like an anchor the rest of our conversation, keeping me in place and drawing me in that moment solely. You got really close to me, and it felt like I was lost again.

I do not remember any words you said, but when you stopped, your face was so close to mine, that it was just an instinct to lift my head a little bit and part my lips, like a kid in front of a candy shop. We stayed like this for a few moments, suspended in time and then you let go of your hand and our bodies immediately created the necessary space between us so that I could start breathing again, and break that highly asphyxiating, static creating, all consuming tension between us.

When everything else was said and done, I took my farewell, with a short hug to everyone, I could not allow myself to give you a bigger hug lest I would break down right there and then and not be able to go anymore. We got into the car, I was beside my friend in the back seat, I really do not remember the conversations we had on the half hour road.

It was as if my mouth was speaking but my spirit was still in the house, where a kiss was hanging in the air, above our heads, being lost and not finding its way. My body was in the car, but my spirit was still in that moment with you where there were like a million strings connecting our minds, our hearts, our loins, and a strong nexus created by everything which was transferred on these strings: thoughts, feelings, desires, everything except words, fused with each other and creating this ball of heat and attraction.

We soon reached the train station, there was still one hour to go, we planned on having a coffee together on a terrace nearby, before I leave. When I started searching for my wallet, first things first, to go and buy my train ticket, I found it in my jackets’ pocket, which is strange, since I always keep it in my fanny bag, together with my mobile phone, and keys, an everything else which is important.

And right then and there my day to day mind came back, my spirit was pulled back from you, and I was in the middle of the train station hall realising I basically forgot my fanny bag together with everything else inside it, and most of my clothes which were still near the side of the couch where I left them mid packing until you came to talk to me. I had a feeling that my backpack was way lighter, but my mind was not with me at the moment I put it in the trunk of the car.

I went outside to my friends waiting for me at the car and burning with embarrassment told them that I had forgotten everything back at the house. My friend started laughing, there was not need for me to explain myself, she already knew what was the matter, we all started laughing, right there, in the middle of the street, like high school girls sharing one joke after another.

When we could calm down, tears and all, my friend called her husband and asked him if he can spot my purple fanny bag and a bag of clothes near the couch. Everything was in plain sight, in between the couch and the fireplace where I dropped them. They arranged everything in a few words and much less seconds, and he was already in his car to deliver my lost bundle.

Half an hour later, we were still outside the car, even forgetting about our coffee, just talking, when we saw the car approaching. I saw that both front seats were occupied and my heart started beating faster with that realisation.

After the car stopped, you opened the door, came out with my fanny bag and my clothes, in one hand, smiling ear from ear, with that fresh air on your face. I guess everybody saw what was happening and let us some space. You came close to me, as close as I needed you to be and before you opened your mouth to say anything, the words rushed from my mouth, God knows from where, since I thought I lost all my smart talking the moment I met you:

„- I guess my mind found a way to please my heart…”

One raised eyebrow, an even larger grin, lips glistening, eyes glittering, inviting me to complete the sentence.

„- I really wanted to see you again!”

Once I was in the train, there was only the sun outside and the thought of you. Once I got back home, I got absorbed with all the messages which were left unanswered since I let my phone uncharged and unattended for so long, and soon my life, as it was, came back like a tidal wave and engulfed me with everything which was going around.

The curious part is that since I arrived back home, I had not thought of you at all, it is so strange if I come to think of it, it was as if my brain blocked something  in me that I wanted so strongly but knew that I could not have, since you were worlds apart from me.

Seven years to this day, I had met you, I know it because Facebook cared to remind me of this beautiful encounter with a memory throwback from seven years ago. It was the first selfie I took with my friend as we were heading for the backyard, you were in the background of our big smiling faces, with your back to the camera, in the left side corner of the photo, blurred and inconspicuous, right before we were acquainted, right before everything started.

My heart twitched and then grew a million times when I saw you in the photo, and everything came back to me. As much as I want to, I cannot remember your face entirely, it eludes me whenever I try to do so, even though your memory is so vivid in every part of my heart, every single inch of my skin which touched yours, the sensation of your embrace and most importantly your eyes, in which I got lost and never found my way back. It feels like you are some sort of vampire, which has a very blurred appearance in a photo but it evokes so much presence, with no clear face but bringing so much force to the feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I don’t know when we’re going see each other again. I am not willing to look for you, since I am absolutely confident that we will find our way to each other, if not in this life, in other lives, again and again. Because I know that my place is in your arms and nowhere else.

All I am left for now is the throwback photo of a happy me from seven years ago and this song which reminds me of our dancing dream.

https://www.infinitelooper.com/?v=2l4alp0De8Y&p=n